Underthinking breaking my nose

So for those of you unaware, I managed to realign my nose during a social game of ice hockey. Now I play Ice hockey to a reasonably high level, but I normally play in net. This was probably my second game in the field as it were, and I managed to break my face.

Safe areas for Aaron highlighted in Blue.

So with my new found freedom of skating any where I decided to do a little experiment, which is harder my face, or the boards.

Trial #1 Conducted by Ice Scientician JP Bertrand (right), indicates the boards are harder.

All though that is not really a robust, trial, I imagine I need to do three replicates at least to be sure. So I had managed to break my nose, and put some pretty good cuts in my head that required stitches, 6 to be precise.

Apparently that is not enough stitches for them to put a bear on my forehead. (I asked)

So anyway the next day the swelling in the bridge of my nose got to ludicrous levels, and coupled with the fact my eyes went black/blue lead to my teammates/flatmates/random strangers began to ponder outloud whether I or not I was turning into an Avatar (The cat ones, not the last airbender ones that would be racist).

That weird screamy one kept hitting on me.

I went to the Doctor, due in large part to the fact I can't breathe through my nose properly. This is pretty inconvenient, expecially when your mouth is preoccupied eating/drinking/kissing/playing didgeridoo.

Which is pretty gay, since it is my favourite hobby.

But apparently due to the large amount of swelling that occurs they don't look at your nose for 7-10 days after it occurred. So today was the day, I went down to the fractured nose clinic, apparently noses get fractured regularly enough they need their own clinic, as far as I am aware no other fracture gets its own clinic. I think that's why stuck up people are said to have their nose in the air since its more important than the other fractured areas of the body.

I am better than you because my nose has its own clinic.

From the clinic it was decided my nose definitely had a lean to the left, so they juiced me up with drugs, and the Doctor realigned it. Now this isn't an exact science no measuring or anything, she just figures what side its leaning and sort hangs off you nose on the other side, until it clicks back into place, and you can definitely hear it.

Okay, got it son, I am going to drop you and hopefully your weight will pull me back into place.

And now I just have to be careful with it in the next three weeks. I got given some care advice, most was good, the only one that made me wonder, was the advice not to lie on my nose. Who needs to be told that, surely not putting a lot of weight on the broken nose is pretty much a given.

What do you mean it isn't good for my nose?